Unashamedly Biased

NINJA!

2009-06-08T13:24:00.003-04:00

Not the assassins, Nine Inch Nails and Jane's Addiction! I was at the Jone's Beach show last night and it was great. The weather held up, except for the wind that kicked up as it got colder later in the night.

The real reason I came to the show was to see NIN because I'm a huge fan of them and saw them at the same theater three years ago where they put on a spectacular show. The performance was just as great as then, but the effects were a bit lacking - that's possibly due to the fact that they were playing alongside another band. Before Trent Reznor finally left the stage he performed "Hurt" as his encore, which is always a crowd pleaser.

What upset me most was how there were no shirts to be found in my size (which is a medium thank you very much). There was one specific shirt that said, on the back, "NIN 1989-2009" and then toward the bottom "wave goodbye."

This is obviously supporting the rumors that this is possibly Reznor's last tour - and that greatly depresses me. But I have hope that it is only a rumor because Reznor made no mention during his performance that this would be his last at Jone's Beach.

Maybe in three more years instead of waving goodbye he can say it.

Nation's Economy Fails to Hire Me

2009-06-06T22:15:00.002-04:00

After going to several local venus and hearing nothing but, "come back in, like, September cause then all the college kids will be gone by that time," I came to two conclusions. 1) I apparently look 15 years old if these crusty girls don't realize that I am a college student and 2) I will most likely not get a job this summer.

Not shockingly, these conclusions have resulted in the creation of my Summer Plan! which is what I will be doing this summer so that I may make money at a future time.

Plan 1: Bike riding and exercise! I have been riding my bike around the state parks here for about an hour each time I go - which I promise myself will be more frequently. This leisurely outdoor activity, coupled with the hours of training I put in each week at karate will (hopefully) result in what I like to call a 'rockin' bod.'

How will this make me money? With a great body and a face as naturally gorgeous and shaped as mine is, I will be in high demand as a high class escort. Are you a filthy rich old woman who is actually filthy? Can't find a date to that Gala? Take me. Show me off to your friends! Not only will I lift my shirt to reveal where a six-pack may one day end up, but I can hold a great conversation.

Plan 2: Write. Not just this blog. I'll work on some short story ideas to plan out and revise. I may even try and crank out that novel that all writers work on their whole lives and never get published (I said that these plans may make me money).

Plan 3: This is the most practical and, therefore, the one that will disinterest you most. I will help a professor do research on 19th Century amateur theatre! This one is definite and I start this Tuesday.

How will this one make me money? It's a nice resume filler, and I'm getting three credits for it. It can't hurt for prospective employers to see that I help a professor in the NYPL go through microfiche and do research from home and a bit of translation work. This one is money for the long run.

So fuck you Nation's economy - I'm going to hire myself!

A Booky Wook that's Jolly Good

2009-05-26T15:35:00.004-04:00

If you are a fan of comedy as well as a fan of anything British, then it is expected that you are a fan of Russell Brand. Thus being a fan of all things British and of Russell Brand, then it can be safely assumed that you are a fan of reading. So read his book.

Brand's "My Booky Wook a Memoir of Sex Drugs and Standup" is a documentation of all the screw-ups and wrong turns throughout his life, but it tells of his recovery and the good things that came out of his trying times as well.

It's tragic, yes, that people go through problems such as eating disorders, mingled with drug and sex addictions. Yet Brand speaks quite jovially of all his old issues (I use the word 'old' loosely because he is still recovering, according to him) in such a way that they come off as un-tragic. Normally it's an "oh-shit!" moment when you introduce Kylie Minogue to your drug dealer, but for Brand it is written more as a muffled "whoops." It's moments like these in his memoir that you'll find yourself laughing at situations that can only be defined as ridiculous.

Of course the subject matter isn't for the faint of heart. Brand speaks of vulgar subjects (not meaning to be offensive, but to him it isn't vulgar) in such a matter-of-fact tone that readers may not expect what their eyes are deciphering. But it's the kind of stuff that makes good literature.

Speaking of, I find it very interesting how many good works of literature and art come from those who have had drug related problems. My mother asked me why I wanted to read this book, because she was skeptic of its drug-related content. I sighed and lifted my sleeve to show her my forearms. She was nervous at first and then said that she didn't see anything there. I know, I said, if I want to write a good book I better get started.

I digress. If anything Brand's "Booky Wook" shows the reader that drugs are never, ever the answer. They make for great story content, though.

Hulu.com scares the shit out of me

2009-05-25T12:28:00.002-04:00

Any H.P. Lovecraft fans would know why the commercials for Hulu.com are a little disarming. Famous actors on TV telling us that they want our brains to rot so they can eat them because they're really aliens? I don't like being so deceived by the television.

For those of you unfamiliar with Lovecraft, he was a horror-fiction writer in the early 1900s who created what is known as the 'Cthulhu Mythos.' It's pronounced "kuh-tooloo," but sometimes it's just pronounced "hooloo" (!!!). The primary figure's name is the aforementioned unpronounceable word, and he is a sort of alien god hidden on Earth waiting to take over the human race.

Those in charge of the Web site say that the word "Hulu" comes from the Chinese language meaning "a holder of precious things," or the second meaning, "interactive recording" (an odd connection, don't you think?). I hope I'm not the only one confused by this. The two conclusions that I arrive to from this definitions are: 1) That by promoting a chinese definition, yet saying that those who run Hulu.com are aliens - the chinese are aliens. I aim to deter from this conclusion, not because it's irrational, but because it comes off as blatantly racist. This leaves me with: 2) That the people who run Hulu.com really are aliens and seek to throw off the populous and the media with they linguistic cunning. I am not deceived!

This all doesn't mean that I don't use the Web site. What kind of human being would I be if I wasn't hypocritical? How else am I supposed to catch up on episodes of 'Dollhouse' (it's amazing by the way) when it's showing on Friday nights? Or what about 'Fringe' which is a Tuesday show? Those are my busy days.

So what if Seth McFarlane's belly button conceals a hungry alien? Or if Eliza Dushku has a long serpentine tongue (I'm actually doubtful of any CGI use for that. My God I'm naughty...)? My point is they may be aliens, and they may want to eat our brains, but they certainly know what we need - television.

Movie Reviews

2009-05-23T16:52:00.002-04:00

In true 'I-think-my-opinion-matters-so-here-is-what-I-think-fashion,' I am going to give brief, most likely spoiler reviews of 'Star Trek,' and 'Terminator: Salvation' because, so far, the only things I've done this summer is see those movies.

'Star Trek'

Grade-wise, I give it an A-. The 'A' indicates that I, for the most part, enjoyed the movie. It had a very coherent story-line and was put together very nicely - and not being cheesy is a huge plus. That pesky minus sign is really stuck there though. Yes, the movie was very good and deserving of all of the praise it's getting - and Chris Pine does give Captain Kirk, a personality. What the movie was really lacking was a good villain.

I'm not asking for a Ledgeresque Joker-villain to steal the show. I'm asking for there to not be some disgruntled future deep space miner who, for reasons unexplained, has the materials to destroy planets. I liked the tattoos and the spear though.

Zachary Quinto really stole the show as Spock. I say this as praise for Quinto because some people say I look like him - props to him, and because he had that kickass haircut that all 5-year-old boys once had. Those points and the fact that he masterfully portrayed a character who was always trying to conceal and suppress his emotions - he's like a space-Snape!

See it if you haven't, it's fun.

'Terminator: Salvation'

Much better than I thought it would be! This isn't just some other film for Christian Bale to change his voice (like in 'Batman') or where he gets to yell at the help. Unlike his role in 'The Dark Knight,' there is no doubt that the civilians in 'Terminator' truly have respect for John Connor, and Bale portrays Connor as a leader who understands what's at stake, yet is immensely stressed by the state of the world.

Like 'The Dark Knight,' Bale isn't the head of the show. Instead it is Sam Worthington, who plays Marcus Wright, that gives the audience the much more interesting character. Wright is a man who was given the death sentence and who agrees to donate his body to science. Years later he wakes up in the strange new world where machines are exterminating human beings. His 'rebirth' reminded me of Frankenstein's monster who had to learn all about the world for himself, and who existed to question what it means to be human.

(Funny side note, some boys were criticizing the film right after we got out of the theater and one of them said 'He was some half human half cyborg thing.' The word cyborg means part human part machine, so he essentially said that they man was either 3/4 human OR if you're half a cyborg, there is 1/4 human, 1/4 machine in you. Your guess is as good as mine as to what the other 1/2 would be. What you don't know could write a book!)

Downsides to the film include some sorry nods to the previous 'Terminator' films - including a 'cameo' of Arnold as a terminator machine.

But, there's good acting and lots of explosions. It was worth the money.

What do both of these films have in common? Anton Yelchin. In 'Star Trek,' he played the character with a Russian accent - which he rightfully pulls of well seeing as how he was born there. And in 'Terminator' he plays Kyle Reese, a character that the film said was important, and you understood why, you just didn't see it. Either way this actor is showing up in a lot of big films and it seems like he's pulling on Shia's coattails. Although we'll see what happens when the next 'Transformers' comes out.